| Over
the years I have noticed that many Christian husbands who
loved their wives still committed adultery, in some cases
more than once. After observing this, I wanted to make sure
that I didn’t fall into the same trap. Over time studying
this matter in the Word and through life experiences, I have
come to certain conclusions. Christian husbands must love
God more than their wives, not just a normal relationship
with God will do. You will need to develop a personal and
amorous relationship with Him. Knowing that He is watching
your every move will help you stay on the straight and narrow.
You can get a room way out somewhere to get ya freak on, but
remember God is omnipresent!
“A man’s ways are in full view of the Lord, and
he examines all his paths.” -Proverbs
5:21
When
you made that vow at the alter, you signed a contract with
God. It’s better not to make a vow, than to break one!
( Ecc. 5:4-5). We love fighting with
shiny but dull swords. Our flesh wants to be polished, not
sharpened. We rebel against accountability and the bible compares
that to witchcraft! (1 Sam 15:23/KJV).
It’s difficult for a man to hold someone accountable
when they themselves run from accountability. When you see
your brother out of line with the Word and challenge him on
his actions, you open yourself up to that same discipline.
That’s why many Christian men lack self control and
quickly give in to their flesh. I call it the, “Lone
Ranger and Tonto mentality”. That’s when a man
rebukes accountability and will only fellowship with someone
who fits into their perspective of Christianity.
He who ignores discipline,
despises himself, but whoever heeds correction gains understanding.
– Proverbs 15:32
Most men won’t admit if they have low self-esteem. This
is one of the main reasons married men commit adultery. Men
need to be affirmed daily, and if we don’t get that
from our wives we search elsewhere. Why search outside of
your marriage for affirmation? Share your thoughts, feelings,
and concerns with your wife (Gen
2:24). Men often times avoid communication
because it may lead into an argument or an hour-long discussion.
Satan loves when we sweep our problems under the rug. Most
of the older married men I know tell me to let my wife have
her way, or to simply not say anything in order to avoid conflict.
What I’ve noticed in a short 5 years of marriage is
that covering up issues and concerns will eventually lead
to a big blow up. It’s similar to painting, in order
to paint over a dark area with a lighter color, it is required
that you prime the surface before painting it. A lot of us
take the short cut and just paint over the surface without
priming it. It will look good for a while, but eventually
the darker color will bleed through. So my wife and I have
agreed to never leave the house without discussing our concerns
with one another, thus giving Satan no ammunition (Ephesians
4:26-27).
6
Simple Ways To Avoid Temptation
1
LOVE AND FEAR THE LORD:
Men I tell you the truth, if you get this right you
will have won half of the battle. Diligently seek the
Lord! (Proverbs 13:4) Adore Him and
Fear Him. Please uproot this God in the sky mentality.
You must KNOW that He’s everywhere and is everything
to all.
2
ACCOUNTABLITY PARTNER:
Iron sharpens Iron! (Proverbs
27:17) Find
someone who will check you when you are going astray.
It takes friction to sharpen a sword, so avoid a polishing
partner. You will look good on the outside but when
the enemy attacks, you’ll break on contact! Make
sure the person you pick is strong in this area, if
not, both of you will eventually co-sign for each other’s
foolishness.
3
TAKE MENTAL “SENSUOUS” PICTURES OF YOUR
WIFE
Fantasizing about your wife will keep the fire going.
Stay aroused about your wife and desire her. She should
be your centerfold!
4
OPEN COMMUNICATION:
Wherever you find marital failure, you will find a breakdown
in real communication.
5
KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND YOUR PURPOSE:
Insecurity is one of our biggest weaknesses. Discover
your purpose, walk in it and know who you are as a man
of God. That way you won’t need a woman besides
your wife to affirm who you are.
6
AVOID CLOSE FEMALE FRIENDSHIPS:
In most cases affairs are usually sparked by
a so-called platonic relationship. You may start off
as friends, but eventually someone will grow feelings
for the other. If you insist on having a close relationship
with a female please understand that you’re playing
with fire (1 Thessalonians
5:22). Make sure that your wife approves
of her and stay alert and listen to the Holy Spirit.
If you start developing feelings for her, cease the
relationship! Also, many of us men will notice that
a female is getting attached to us, but instead of fleeing,
(because we like the attention) we pray that God will
give us the strength to deal with the situation. |
“FLEE FROM SEXUAL IMMORALITY. ALL OTHER SINS A MAN COMMITS
ARE OUTSIDE HIS BODY, BUT HE WHO SINS SEXUALLY SINS AGAINST
HIS OWN BODY” (1 Corinthians
5:18).
Learn to love God with all your heart! It should
crush you to disappoint Him over some sex! Men when you really
look at it, is sex outside of marriage worth it? Possibly
losing you wife, your kids and their respect for you, respect
of your peers, etc.
“My
goal is to love my wife so much that I’d hate sleeping,
because that’s 8 hours of the day that I wouldn’t
see her.” - Maji |
